Bogus Green Ideas

1. Ford launches new line of coal powered scooters.
2. EPA publishes a 565 page book on deforestation, make required textbook for high school seniors.
3. Reduce amount of toilet flushes by peeing in the sink instead.
4. Replace newsprint with stone tablets.
5. Instead of gasoline, cars now run on Gatorade.
6. Start massive fire to burn all magazines that contain pictures of Dodge trucks.
7. Abolish toilet paper, instead clean ass with soap and water.
8. Re-introduce luxury pedal powered cars, as in the Flintstones.
9. Replace all flooring, wallpaper, windows and curtains in my house with solar panels.
10. Change maximum speed limit on highways to 12 mph, except for bicycles.
11. Open up chain of windmill themed hamburger joints.
12. Paint all road surfaces green, except in Arizona where they would be painted yellow.