1. Can finally beat aunty midge at arm wrestling.
2. No need for drinking down those aweful tasting protein shakes five times a day.
3. If Hummer gets a flat, you can lift it up which aunty midge changes the tire.
4. Governor no longer calling you "girlie man" when he phones.
5. Previous home run distance record of one mile just a distant memory.
6. No need to worry about using birth control because equipment is retired.
7. Now in fits of rage I can rip apart my laptop one bit at a time.
8. Rite aid now offers chocolate easter egg and steroid bunny bucket.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
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