Advantages of a bear proof suit

1. Comes with a whole year's supply of honey from Walmart.
2. Get free seasons tickets to all college teams having a bear mascot.
3. In addition to protection from bears, also safe from marauding squirrels attacks.
4. Can also pour you a martini if you deposit 25c.
5. Only three fatalities are reported from persons who were attacked by bears while wearing such a suit last month.
6. Acceptable prom attire - Jefferson High School, East Orange, N.J.
7. Is also fireproof, except for the inner lining - which is highly flammable.