Good Things About Valentine's Day

1. McDonald's including ice cream flavored condom in all happy meals
2. Philips releases all new laser eyebrow and pubic hair trimmer formerly used in the space program
3. Area man gets to increase his frequency of sex with his girl friend from 0.75 to 0.83 times per week.
4. Costco running a special sale on the 10,000 pack magnum condoms.
5. Match.com offering a free day with annual subscription
6. Walgreens special promotion: V-day pack including massage oil, viagra and rogaine.
7. Uncle Joe's crab shack installing mood lighting for valentines day brunch
8. Local Hooters waitresses giving out cool mints to well behaved patrons
9. Dick Clark still dropping "the ball" in Times Square
10. Even considering the tough economy, the cities professional gigalo's usually get extra tips.