Closest that I have come to real celebrities

1. 7/5/1996. Arnold Schwartzenager when he was filming Junior at UC Berkeley. Fifty feet away but I could see his head sticking up from the crowd of actors. I think Danny De Vito was also in there somewhere, but I could not spot him.
2. 11/6/2008. David Schwimmer when he attended at members reception at the Cherry Lane Theater New York. I crashed the reception. I was in the stage, he was in the entrance of the theater. With the lights on I could only see his outline, but he was just twenty feet away. It pretty much looked like him, the big hair and all.
3. 5/4/2008. President Bushes motorcade arriving at the White House. I was fourty feet away, but I think he was in the middle black limo. I have it on video that I recorded with my pocket camera.
4. 11/8/2008. Ben Stiller, err... well I think it was him filming in Central Park, but when I enlarged the picture it turns out it was not him, and they were just some German tourists.
5. 3/5/2007. Russell Crowe filming a movie near the white house, but when I asked around, it was just a gripper that looks like Russell from far away. Then the security guy asked me to leave.
6. 6/1/2010 Colin Quinn of SNL lives in my building. I see him at the gym sometimes. We haven't spoken yet, but next time I'm gonna ask him to do his DeNiro impression.
7. Danica McKellar of the wonder years tv show has written some math books for teenagers. I got her to autograph my copy and handed her a BrainiacDating card

Famous last words

1. I thought that you said it was on autopilot?
2. Hmm, the sidewalks look kinda crowed here, and this doesn't look much like Brooklyn.
3. Wow, those linemen look a lot bigger from up close.
4. I think the red wire is always ground, right?
5. Oh its nothing, I think that cute doggie just got into the mayo.
6. You have skied the double black diamonds before, right?
7. Can you lean back a little more so that your shoes come in to the picture.
8. Did you say the red ones or brown ones were poisonous?
9. Are you sure that this will float?
10. Hey copper, that donut will make you fat.
11. sure its safe to sit this close to the goalie even though they removed the safety netting, the puck never comes this way.
12. It's just a toy gun.
13. Coursh I know how to use fireworks.
14. This kinda pork steak stays fresh for days without refrigeration.
15. Fancy another scotch before we head out onto the racetrack Bob?
16. Don't worry, he's always a little wobbly at first when he gets on the tightrope.
17. No matter what you do, don't give the bear the bottle of honey.
18. Hey Mr Vice President, how about doing a little duck hunting at my ranch this weekend?
19. Don't worry the tigers can never get out of their enclosure.
20. Look out for the tree. What ...
21. Its not really that slippery out on the deck.